The Bread Diet — “a safer way to gain alluring slenderness.” It “cuts down excess weight without starvation, fatigue or nervous strain.” Imagine enjoying TWO slices of bread with every meal AND losing weight! Not only that, but look at what you can do with the energy you’ll get from 2 slices of bread:
That’s right — you can wash windows for an hour! So maybe you can’t shatter the glass ceiling — at least you can clean it! Know what else you can do on 2 slices of bread?
That’s right — you can iron for an hour! No wonder women started working outside the home — who wants to stay home and eat bread and iron and clean windows? By the way — how long do you think I could wash windows or iron on a pint of Blue Bell Cookies & Cream?
One more benefit of the Bread Diet is that it apparently helps you grow freakishly long legs:
So how’s that New Year’s diet going? Have you already abandoned it for the Bread Diet? I’m pleased to say that I have managed to stick with my New Year’s diet. One of my favorite “diet” foods is shrimp — Gulf coast wild caught shrimp, to be exact. 3 ounces of shrimp has only 76 calories, 15 grams of protein, 1 gram of fat, and 1 gram of carbohydrates. I don’t know if that provides enough energy to wash windows for an hour, but then again, I don’t really care.
Inspired by the vintage ad and New Year’s diet resolutions, here’s a simple recipe for Shrimp and Avocado Salsa that we really enjoyed. Pick a ripe, but firm avocado and handle it gently so as not to turn the salsa into guacamole. This would make a good Super Bowl appetizer. (I suppose if you’re really trying to watch it, you could scoop it onto a lettuce leaf instead of a tortilla chip, but then it would be Shrimp and Avocado Sadness.)
½ pound cooked wild-caught shrimp, cleaned, deveined, and coarsely chopped
2 large firm but ripe avocados, pitted, peeled, and diced
1 small serrano chile, seeds and ribs removed, minced
Juice of 1 small lime
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro, plus sprig for optional garnish
Instructions
Place all ingredients in a medium bowl, and gently fold together until combined, taking care not to mash the avocados. Transfer to serving bowl and garnish with cilantro sprig, if desired. Serve with tortilla chips.
In March I attended oral argument in an appeal that I worked on for the better part of the past year (I think it was the last case the court heard in person before the pandemic). The argument was here in Houston, so I didn’t get to travel to some exotic corner of the Lone Star State, but going to the grand historic Harris County 1910 Courthouse for any reason is always awe-inspiring.
Historic Harris County 1910 Courthouse
If you’re gonna be important . . .
The courthouse, “a six story structure of neo-classical design topped by a prominent clerestory drum and dome,” served as home to Houston’s district courts in the early part of my career, but underwent a 7-year restoration and was rededicated in 2011, and now houses both of Houston’s courts of appeals. You can read about the restoration here. You won’t, but you could if you wanted to. The courthouse is one of the most significant judicial buildings in Texas, and is stunning.
The interior is covered in bookmatched black-veined gray marble and is quite impressive:
Grand marble stairways
Bookmatched marble
But we weren’t there to dilly dally in the hallways. Off to the courtroom where all the action was.
Where the grownups get to sit
The cousins table
The boss collecting his thoughts before argument
Oral argument was, um, interesting. The court issued its opinion about 3 months later, and well, all I can say is win some, lose some, all in the same case.
I can’t really talk about the case (but believe me, I really really want to) because it is an ongoing matter, so instead I’ll leave you with a “Houston” recipe. Well, sorta “Houston” — it’s from Houston’s, a chain restaurant here in Houston. Founded in 1977 by the Hillstone Restaurant Group, it’s maintained its dark fern bar vibe and menu of retro “American classics” (prime rib, barbecue pork ribs, spinach and artichoke dip, French dip au jus, etc.) through the decades. It’s a sentimental favorite of a lot of folks, and a popular place for date night.
One of our favorite things to order at Houston’s is Grilled California Artichokes with House-Made Remoulade:
When I ran across artichokes not long ago at the ridiculously low price of 2 for $1, I bought a huge bagful and took a crack at making Houston’s artichokes.
The recipe isn’t hard, but it does require some prep work, These make a terrific appetizer. Even though I can’t claim a complete victory in my case (how I wish I could tell you about it), I was definitely winning with these delicious grilled artichokes. And here’s a pro tip for you: stir some of the leftover remoulade into shrimp salad and win again.
Trim the stems and tops of the artichokes, and cut in half lengthwise. Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add lemons, garlic, peppercorns, and artichokes. Reduce heat and simmer, covered, for about 15 minutes until stems are tender and leaves pull of easily. Drain well. When cool enough to handle, remove fuzzy choke from center with a spoon.
Preheat grill. Brush cut side of artichokes with olive oil and place cut side down on grill. Grill for 5-10 minutes, until the edges are slightly charred..
Prepare remoulade by placing all ingredients in a food processor (a mini chopper works well), and process until combined. Transfer to a small bowl and season to taste with salt and pepper. Keep refrigerated until ready to use.
Serve artichokes with remoulade. Provide lots of napkins and a bowl for discarded leaves.
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To prep the artichokes, trim the stems, cut the artichokes in half lengthwise, and slice about 1/2″ off the top:
Tops trimmed and cut in half lengthwise
Boil them in a large pot of lightly salted water, with a lemon cut into quarters, a few garlic cloves, and a teaspoon of black peppercorns:
Simmer until tender with lemons, garlic, and black peppercorns
Simmer until the artichokes are gray-green and the stem can be pierced easily with the tip of a paring knife:
Gray-green and bottoms are tender
When the artichokes are cool enough to handle, scoop out the fuzzy choke with a spoon:
After I “choked” them
Heat the grill, brush the cut sides of the artichokes with olive oil, and grill for a few minutes until slightly charred around the edges:
Nice smoky char
Remoulade seals the deal
PRO TIP: Stir a little leftover remoulade into shrimp salad (It also makes a tasty sandwich spread):
