I found this elf at an estate sale:
Not exactly the Elf on the Shelf — more like the Gnome in My Home.
He reminded me of my favorite holiday movie, Elf. And of my favorite line from the movie, where Buddy the Elf is sent to work in the mailroom, and he says “It’s just like Santa’s workshop, except it smells like mushrooms and everyone looks like they wanna hurt me.” Just like my last job.
I have a mushroom story. Doesn’t everyone? When I was getting ready to leave for law school, my nurse friends threw me a surprise party, complete with a stripper dressed like a cop and lots of sex toys. Because everyone associates lawyers with sex, right? I gave away most of the sex-related toys, but hung on to this little wind-up pecker because it was just so hilarious and stupid:
I kept the little pecker in a small covered basket on my coffee table. Isn’t that where everyone keeps their wind-up pecker? My landlord’s little girl used to like to hang out with me every once in a while, and on one visit she reached for the basket, but before she could open it, I grabbed it from her. This, of course, heightened her curiosity about the contents of the basket, and every time she came by she made a beeline for the basket. She finally got to it before me one day, and when she opened it she gasped, “Ewww — it’s an ugly mushroom!” Yes, indeed — an ugly mushroom.
Speaking of mushrooms, I recently bought some fresh morel mushrooms, a first for me. Talk about an ugly mushroom!
Inspired by the smug little elf and the mushroom-smelling mailroom, I made Pasta with Morels, Leeks, and Peas. We never indulge in cream-based pasta dishes around here, and this was a real treat. I loved everything about this dish, but most of all the earthy mushrooms.
- 12 ounces fresh morel mushrooms, cleaned, stems trimmed, and very coarsely chopped*
- 1 medium leek, cleaned and thinly sliced
- 1 clove garlic, minced
- 1 tablespoon butter
- ¼ cup diced cooked ham
- ¼ cup dry white wine
- ¾ cup whipping cream
- ½ cup reduced-sodium chicken broth
- 1-1/4 cups frozen peas, thawed
- Salt and freshly-cracked black pepper, to taste
- 10 ounces fresh pappardelle or linguine pasta
- ¼ cup chopped fresh Italian parsley
- * If morels are unavailable, you can use shiitake or cremini mushrooms.
- Melt butter in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add morels, leeks, and garlic, and cook, stirring often, until morels and leeks are just tender. Remove to a bowl with a slotted spoon.
- Add the ham to the skillet, and cook for 3-4 minutes, stirring occasionally, until just starting to brown. Remove the skillet from the heat and add the white wine. Return to heat and cook for 1 minute. Add the cream and broth, and cook, stirring often, until sauce thickens enough to coat the back of a spoon, approximately 6 to 8 minutes. Return morels to skillet and add peas. Cook for 3 to 4 minutes or until peas are just tender. Season to taste with salt and pepper.
- Meanwhile, in a large pot of salted water cook pasta according to directions until just al dente. Drain, and add to skillet over low heat, tossing until heated through and well combined. Transfer to serving bowl and sprinkle with parsley. Serve hot.
Morels, leeks, and garlic getting tender
No one will have to wind you up to come eat this meal!